The Art of Winding-Down for Bed

By Dr. Benjamin Metta Penhas, PsyD

Nothing screams frustration more than the experience of tossing and turning all night without being able to fall asleep. Unfortunately, this is a common experience that most of us go through at least occasionally, and some more often than others. According to the Center for Disease Control, about 70 million adults suffer from sleep problems in the United States, about one in three adults. There is a lot to be said about having healthy sleeping habits. This blog will focus on one of the most important aspects of having healthy sleep: bedtime routines.

As children, most of us are taught some sort of healthy sleep routines such as having a consistent bedtime, no electronics past certain times (maybe you did not even have electronics at all), and no playtime before bed. However, as we age and become autonomous, certain habits fall through, especially sleep habits. After the hustle and bustle of a long day, it is essential to wind down properly before going to sleep.

Think of this as your brain being a bicycle going down an endless hill. Even though you have stopped pedaling (end of the workday, put the kids to bed, dishes are clean, etc.) the bike will keep moving and will keep rolling down the hill if it is left alone to do so. When you implement a healthy sleep routine you are putting the brakes on the bike so it eventually stops when you need it to.

Of course, it is not humanly possible to carry out the perfect sleep routine because each day your needs to wind down are parallel with the demands from the day or the past couple of days. So let’s agree to hold these practices as “aspirations” but do our best to achieve them.

Set a bedtime

Do your best to keep a set bedtime every day, even during the weekends and holidays. Your body has its internal clock that is called the circadian rhythm. Your circadian rhythm regulates the release of certain hormones at certain times of the day (we will explore this further later). Your circadian rhythms are influenced by context but also have a mind of their own. So it’s okay to, once in a while, dysregulate your sleep schedule by a few hours during the weekend but you also have to balance it out on the following days so it doesn’t snowball into something worse.

When setting a bedtime, it is essential to remember that the human body needs about 7 to 9 hours of sleep per day. This timeframe tends to vary depending on the amount of stress that is in your life. Although its difficult to sleep when stressed, remember that the more stressed you are the more sleep your body needs.

Wind-down

Winding-down looks different for everybody. We will go over a few different options that tend to work for most people. The wind-down process should start about 90 minutes before going to bed. Once wind-down has begun it is important to set boundaries with what is relaxing and what is not. A good rule of thumb is that if you feel like your brain is active (the bike is rolling down the hill), then that is probably not a good wind-down activity for you.

Common wind-down strategies:

· No work or school-related work 90 minutes before bed.

o Any type of work is the opposite of what you need. So, leave it for tomorrow if you can.

· Hot showers.

o Take a nice long hot shower about an hour before bed.

· Dim the lights.

o Lightbulbs were invented a little over a century ago. Humans have been alive for much much longer. Our ancient brains still require certain cues from the environment to go to sleep, and the level of light is definitely one of them. Remember, just because having lightbulbs is normal does not mean it is natural.

· Do a stretching or yoga routine.

· Drink warm, calming drinks (nothing caffeinated, nothing with alcohol).

· Read a fiction or calming book.

o Reframe from reading anything academic, scientific, school or business-related. Same advice goes to listening to a podcast.

· Stay away from technology!

For the last suggestion of staying away from technology, I think it would be helpful for us to review this a bit more. Limiting your social media in your life might be a good discussion for another time but right now let’s focus on why it is helpful to limit social media before bed.

Let’s start by analyzing the premise of technology specifically the internet (and you can't really use the internet without screens). Almost everything on the internet, whether it is social media, news, podcasts, TV, pornography, movies, games, everything has a single goal: to keep you hooked on the product. The only goal that social media has is to keep you scrolling, the same thing is true with TV shows‑their sole purpose is for you to watch the next episode. With that in mind, it is no wonder that we often intend to check our phones quickly, and somehow 30 minutes go by.

Remember circadian rhythms? One of the big indicators for our brains to kickstart our sleep hormone (Melatonin) production is the absence of blue light. This mythical light that everybody talks about but nobody can see, is a specific type of light (sort of like UV Ray) that the sun produces during the morning hours to signal to our brains it is time to wake up and stop producing melatonin. Screens produce blue light. Many devices today have technology to turn off the blue light at certain times of the day, however that is still not enough to trick our brains into going to sleep. Making sure that there is no screen time before bed it’s a good way of signifying to your brain that it is time for you to go to sleep.

Another significant reason to stay off screens and especially social media or certain types of shows before bed is because of … anxiety. Social media is beautiful in certain ways and damaging in other ways. One of the biggest ways technology companies keep us hooked on their product is by elevating our anxieties. Seeing your high school friend flying private jet to Hawaii might make you happy, but it might also bring up other emotions and other types of thoughts. Also, it is almost impossible to use the internet without seeing arousing political news, or seeing something you like that you want to buy. Whether positive or negative, activating your brains before bed is not a good idea. It is important to regulate and protect our brains before we go to sleep. You already did the wind-down technique, and even if you’re comfy laying in your bed and you pull up your phone it is like starting to pedal the bike again.

In conclusion, a large amount of the population suffers from occasional sleeping problems, what this means is that people are having trouble sleeping. However, many times the problem is not with actually sleeping it is about getting to a point that your body and your brain are ready to sleep. There are situations that the cause of sleep problems is not just because of bad habits. Mental health and biological factors also can impair our ability to fall asleep or maintain our sleep. Speaking with a therapist or a medical doctor about what else you can do in your life to help your sleep might be a good idea.

The Art of Winding-Down for Bed